The events currently unfolding around us are undoing what we are familiar with, throwing us off balance. As a coach, I help my clients make sense of these changes and comprehend that our tomorrow is being shaped by the drastic shifts happening today. For meaningful future growth, therefore, we must cultivate the seeds today; we must also be able to identify and weed out the seeds that could grow to hurt us at a later date.
I acquired the idea that the seeds of future growth or destruction are being sown in the present from coach and thought leader Jennifer Garvey Berger. To me, this indicates we have agency in shaping our future because it also involves actively seeking out the possibilities that lie at our feet at all times. We learn how to be present and pay attention to what we are cultivating. However - to extend the horticultural metaphor - we need a couple of gardening tools in this cultivation process. These are the twin processes of sense-making and perspective: one informs the other. Our agency depends on both the sense that we make of our circumstances and the perspective we have on the choices we make.
Often, we set our sights on the future and create an imaginary start line. We feel that until we approach this line, our actions do not sufficiently matter. As a coach, I work with the perspective that the boundary between today and tomorrow exists only for time keeping; our lives really play out along a nonlinear continuum so that what really matters is that we do (or don’t do) X today, to make (or not make) Y happen tomorrow. I find that such a perspective helps my clients because being aware that tomorrow may have already begun makes a difference to how they see outcomes.
I do caution them, however, that having agency does not give us full control over outcomes. We need a clear perspective to also make sense of those outcomes that do not meet expectations. The Yiddish proverb, ‘Man Plans and God Laughs’, comes to mind when I consider this. Certainly, being laughed at for daring to plan isn’t a comfortable feeling; but the way I see it, this proverb does not imply that humans have no agency and no power to influence their tomorrow. When plans do not go as expected, it does not mean that our efforts have less value.
We still have agency in how we process and make meaning of outcomes. I help my clients pause over what it means to have specific events (or outcomes) stop or alter our plans. Together we - coach and client - slow down time and co-create sense out of the choices they made that influenced their decisions; go into the decisions that shaped their plans; and dissect the plans that changed outcomes or the outcomes that did not take the expected shape.
The events shaping our world in 2020 are larger than any one person or plan. In helping clients develop perspective and make sense of the tectonic shifts around us, I facilitate their growth professionally and personally. This is development coaching, not just skill building. And I continue to offer members of the community 90-minute spot coaching sessions. Contact me!